007: You Have to Give Yourself Permission To Succeed and To Fail Because it is In The Same Action with Heather Havenwood

Hello everybody it is Neil Ball here, thank you so much for joining me today on the entrepreneur way. The entrepreneur way is about the entrepreneur’s journey, the vision, the mindset, the commitment, the sacrifice, failures, and successes. I am so excited to bring you our special guest today, Heather Havenwood. Before I do, I am just going to give a quick quote for you, Anne Rice said, ‘I am always looking and I am always asking questions.’ The entrepreneur way asks the questions, so we all get the insight, inspiration and ideas to apply in our business. Heather, welcome to the show. Are you ready to share your version of the entrepreneur way with us?

Thank you very much. And I love Anne Rand, she’s amazing. Great writer. Great person. Never met her obviously but amazing quote thank you.

Heather Havenwood is the CEO of Havenwood Worldwide. LLC and Chief Sexy Boss. She is a serial entrepreneur and is regarded as a top authority in internet marketing business strategies and marketing. She is also the author of two dating books. In 2006 Heather started, developed and grew an online information marketing publishing company from zero to over one million dollars in sales. In less than 12 months. She has produced and managed over 350 seminars and events and hosted teleseminars with many online thought leaders. Such as Alex Mandozian and Joe Sugarman. Heather can you provide us with some more insight into your business and personal life? To allow the listeners to get to know more about who you are?

Yeh thank you for having me. Its always weird to hear someone’s bio you know? Ha ha ha. I am like, oh is that me? Yeh thank you for that, I really appreciate it. Entrepreneurship is I think, I love your podcast saying entrepreneur, because its really a journey. That is how I consider it. I think that, I just wrote an article on linked in and I think its going to come out probably in the next week or two. Its basically about that entrepreneurship is a journey. But not being asoteric about it, is that for me I am a glutton for punishment. Over a period of time, I kept constantly going back to the corporate world. And kept getting fired. And I have been fired I think 5 times.

Wow.

It was all my jobs yeh. And it is always like a loving firing, like we love you and .. they even bring in this revenue. Every time I got fired it always confused me, because I was always a good employee, I always brought in revenue for the company. It is just that the challenge was I was always kind of butted heads with the managers because I was like ‘why would you say that.’ and ‘the better way to do that is this’ and they are like, ‘you can’t do that with the managers’ they are like ‘why not?’ you know. Kind of like Anne Rand, I constantly ask questions and I constantly when I kind of move the line. So today I am an entrepreneur, I work from home, I work for myself. I manage a few businesses online. A couple of businesses online as well as create as well as manage as well as co-produce for somebody else. So I have a couple of things going on but mainly I run full time on my marketing from home, so that is kind of what my world looks like here in Austen Texas.

Yeh you look like you are very busy. So what do you enjoy most about what you do?

Well being able to work from home. Ha ha ha, I think that is one of the beautiful advantages of being able to create the lifestyle that I want to. But it is work. I do a lot of work. But actually one of the major things that I love to do, is actually helping people, so that is the space I am in now. Is the last year I have been outwardly seeking potential clients that I could work with. That I can say, ‘ok I have done this work, I am still managing these businesses, I want to help you do what I do.’ So that is the part that I really am enjoying right now. Working with my clients.

Right ok, and what is it that drives you?

What drives me is believe it or not to expand. The reason I love entrepreneurship is I am constantly expanding, who I am, what I know, I am constantly learning, I am constantly creating. And actually I giggled when this question came up was, one of the things that drives me is staying away from the cubicle. Ha ha ha.

Yeh I got the idea that might be.

You either tore something away from something as Tony Robbins always does and honestly one of the things that always drives me, is to stay away from the cubicle.

Yeh I think we all want to do that, don’t we.

yeh

Ha ha ha ha. So how do you relax when you are not doing all the things you are doing, you just seem so incredibly busy.

Thank you for that, I really love and I think I learned this from Dan Kennedy, I love watching stories. So nowadays, we have this thing called NetFlix right, where we get to watch a series all at once. You know gorging, I love doing that actually. I love watching the stories develop. Of course, Game of Thrones, I love the story. I could watch it over and over again, not about just the overall arc, but like the intricacies of the journey of each particular character. As well as like right now, I am kind of going believe it or not, I am going through the Sopranos. I never really watched the Sopranos from the beginning,

Yeh

Because at the time in my life when it was airing, and so now by going through the Sopranos and you know, I love the main guy Tony. He is such not only a bad A – but he is an entrepreneur. I mean that is what entrepreneurship is, you know, mafia or not, he drives business. The whole point of the ‘mafia’ is to make money. You know what I mean, now of course they have different ways of doing it. That are not legal necessarily, but if you look at the essence. He is a CEO, you know what I mean, he is CEO of these guys. So I love that right now, I am on season three and I started from the beginning. So that is what I do in the back of my brain because I am also thinking about copy. I am also thinking, oh I could use that in copy, and how does that character? We have all ran this, its I guess I am studying other entrepreneurs all the time.

You sound like you have been listening to Dan Kennedy too much.

Yes yes a long time ago so I do love Dan Kennedy. Its about you know, I think, I laugh about it, but honestly, I find inspiration inside of watching other people mentor. But the mentor does not have to be someone we know, it could be like a Tony Soprano, of course we all know his character. But really there are essences of Tony you know that, in the Sopranos, you know like, thats like a quality. You could pick up, I could use that in a particular situation. Obviously not killing people, you know what I mean, but like you can learn from characters. I think, and I think that is what Dan Kennedy kind of like points to. And I love about it.

Yeh. I think that is a great segway to my next question, which is what entrepreneurial role models do you have?

Joe Sugarman. Joe Sugarman is a dear friend of mine and he has a .. to my book. But he has been really such an inspiration, if you don’t know who he is, or someone listening doesn’t know who he is, he is, well I call him, he calls himself and other people call him The Grandfather. He used to call it himself actually, other people call him, The Grandfather of copywriting. Before even Dan Kennedy. You know, he is the CEO and founder blue-blocker sunglasses. He has got an amazing story of how that happened. His story, his journey is pretty amazing, but he always taught me, he always says to me, ‘Heather, everything happens for the best.’ And when he first told me that, of course my brain was, ‘everything happens for the reason’ because that was what I was told when I was a kid. Which is the worst thing you could tell anybody, especially kids, because we look for the reason. Like if you skin your knee or something really bad happens right? why did that happen? why did that happen? whats the reason? whats the reason? and lets flip on it with everything happens for the best. And its like whatever happens, good or bad, there is something else, that is driving that.

Yeh

Spirit, heavens, whatever you want to call it, but everything happens for the best. And I believe that because I went through a massive bankruptcy, a massive forclosure, I went through hitting my head on the wall literally and just losing everything. And I promise you, I asked a thousand questions of why it happened. But now its like, you know what, it happened for the best. And it did. It really kind of brought me to where I am at today.

Yeh I can understand that.

He is definately an entrepreneurial model for me.

Are you ready to take your mind back to the time before you were an entrepreneur?

Oh sure.

Lets do it then. Ha ha ha ha.Those happy times in the cubicle. So what difficulties did you have to overcome, when you started your business?

Thanks for that, I have you know its not like I have overcome them you know what I mean, thats kind of how I look at it. I am still dealing with them. I think as entrepreneur, we are constantly dealing with them. The biggest one is implementation and distraction. I still to this day I have to turn off things. And not listen to, there is a lot of noise. You know, especially social media, there is a ton of noise out there. And there is a question that I put everything to, and that is, ‘does this feed my confusion or strengthen my clarity?’ and I put that question out to everything. There is power in that question. ‘does this feed my confusion or strengthen my clarity?’ I put that to, before I buy a udipity course, before I buy you know, ice-cream. Like I put it to everything because either things that we are doing ok, or buying or doing, are taking us forward or taking us backwards. Ok and so thats with conversations, thats with relationships too. And so that is what I do now, but I promise you there is definately a period of my life that I was spinning in circles. And I constantly was questioning everything and I did not know which way to go, I just knew I had this dream. But I had no way to get there. I think that is the biggest thing I have had to overcome.

Ok and did you have any doubts that delayed you starting your business?

Yeh I still had doubts. ha ha ha thats one thing I am learning. I have a coach and she is really helping me with like ok because I go to her, I go ok, you are going to tell me. And she is like, I am not going to tell you, she tells me, you have got to learn to go inside yourself. And look for answers for yourself. And that is so challenging because I want her somebody else to tell me it is ok and then I go and do it and if it fails or does well, I can blame it on them. And that is a challenge for any entrepreneur, here is why, especially in the states but also in the UK. We are taught from age six to18, we go from grade one through twelve at least. If not going through college. And we are taught you cannot do anything unless you ask the teacher.

Yes.

And then entrepreneurship is all about do it and then if it fails, you got to take responsibility, right? So it is a total wind-shift and that is a really hard one. Because we are taught so many years at a very young age, like don’t do that, did you ask the teacher? What did the teacher say? Do what the teacher says. And so I think that is the biggest challenge of what an entrepreneur is. You have got to let all that go. And be rebels. Conflict rebels.

Disruptive thinking.

Disruptive thinking yeh, Uber, I think if Uber were here in Austen, and Austen is having this constant I mean it was all over the globe at this point but Austen right now is the number three city for them, meaning the most revenue. The top three city. And so they are constant battling. And I love Uber, because it disrupted, I mean it really disrupted this city. I love it, I mean personally I love Uber. But I find it fascinating how this little business, this little app disrupted you know, the city council here. I mean, they are just bomboggled. Like how do we control this company, how do we make money from these guys. And I just find it, and for me as an entrepreneur I just giggled. I am like ‘oh you guys.’ Because you can’t control it, you are pissed you know.

Yep.

And so, I forgot the name of the guy who owns it, I should know it. Who founded it, but I just love the disruptive thinking. That

Yeh it is great thing so what mistakes did you make that slowed your journey.

Not trusting myself, kind of going to what I just said but not where I see myself and not being really clear.

Ok.

You know staying in the confusion.

Yeh ok. And what are some of the things you did before you started your business that would be helpful tips for some of the listeners. Who have not yet taken that first step of the entrepreneur’s way.

Get a coach, get a coach, get a coach get a coach. I kind of have a story about how I call my dad dumb to me when I was 25 and I had to get a coach. Its kind of a funny but my dad is a business coach and I remember I called him when I was 25 or 26 and I just got fired from my big corporate job and I am like, I don’t know what to do. You know I was really confused about life at this point, and he said ok, I am done, you did not get a coach you know, I am out. Kind of thing and ‘you don’t love me, your job is to like mentor me as my dad’ and honestly, I have got to give him some credit, it took me a few years to forgive him on that but I have got to give him some credit because really he was right, I needed a third party. He is too connected, you know parents, friends, aunts and uncles. They are family. They have known you since you were a kid. A coach sees you for what you say you want. Not they remember what you did when you were six you know. They see another part of you and they hear your goals and they help you get there, so honestly I did I got a coach when I was about 25/26 and I pretty much had a coach since then.

Yeh If I remember rightly, you do coaching as well don’t you? yeh

And now I coach right?

So the coach has a coach and she coaches herself. Its awesome.

Yeh rumours are I think Oprah had a coach, I think Tony Robbins has four or five coaches. I think every great person out there has a coach. The president has multiple advisors and multiple coaches. You know Bill Clinton one time actually called Tony Robbins, I mean real people that are up to big things in life, have coaches.

Yeh I think people don’t always realise that do they? Especially in business, I think people think, ‘well I will figure it out myself.’ But sometimes it is just quicker to have a coach, who is going to guide you and give you a different perspective, and things isn’t it, so.

Yeh. Because I think honestly I will speak for just a second, coaches are not an advisor, you have lawyers or advisors. But a coach is someone who really makes sure you are tapping into your higher self in a way, and saying ‘well what do you think?’ like ‘give me the answer’ no, what do you think? You know. Noooo, so I think that is a better, its really helped me through my entrepreneurial journey.

Yeh. Good, so knowing, what I want to do now is, I want to move forward to that entrepreneurial journey. Heather. So knowing what you now, is there anything that if you had known it when you started out would have helped you to shortcut the learning curve?

Yes fail fast. Meaning when you get an idea, your guts like ‘this is the idea, go for it’ you got to sit on ideas for a little bit of a time. What I call incubate, that is what Joe Sugarman says, you got to incubate an idea. Its there, you got to act. Act. Just implement. If it is not the right avenue. It will show up pretty fast like it will become apparent. Not that it won’t ever have walls but it will be apparent if you are on the right track or not, it makes sense. You got to come up with thing like walls if you are on the right track. So that is the biggest thing is implement. And I will tell you a story, that is a couple of years ago, in the middle of my bankruptcy right, I was going through all that, it was really a bad time.

And I was at a retreat, an entrepreneurial retreat. Florida. A dear friend of mine Bill, and we were sitting there and he was doing some coaching and I am crying, I am all upset. Bankruptcy whatever. He is having none of it right, he is like ahh shut up, you know. And he makes me get a piece of paper, and he gives me a pen. And he goes, I am going to write this down, and basically what he had me write was he said, ‘I Heather, give myself full permission and full licence to fail.’ and I am writing it and I am just in tears because I really realised that was it. I never gave myself permission to fail, and fail and fail and fail, because that is what entrepreneurship is, its fail, succeed, fail fail fail, succeed. I mean Joe Sugarman always told me that, the reason why he is so successful is because he has failed alot. I get that. I have failed alot.

Yeh

But it was up until that point I never gave myself permission to fail, so scared to get back up again, you know get back up on the bike again. And that kind of gave me that permission. And that was the moment I realised, not only that but also from a very young age because I am driven, I never wanted to fail. You know, so in school and college, I did not want to look bad, I did not want to look like I failed. And then here is an entrepreneurial journey, its like ‘go fail, go fail, go fail until you find something that works.’ That is so kind of intuitive, so that was the moment I gave myself full permission and a licence to fail and I think if I could give that to people, that is a huge piece, that is you got to give yourself permission to fail. I say give yourself permission to succeed. Its in the same action.

Yeh I think alot of people like play safe don’t they. They like to live safe and unfortunately that is not this journey really is it?

It really is not. You have got to give yourself permission to fail and give yourself permission to succeed all at the same time, its the same licence, licence to kill, but the licence to go out and succeed. But it is a double edged sword. If you give yourself the licence to succeed, you are also giving yourself the licence to fail. And if you look at really powerful people Donald Trump is in the news here alot right now in the United States so I will just kind of throw him up.

Ok.

Yeh he’s failed, hes failed, he’s succeeded, he’s failed. He’s succeeded, he’s failed. thats the journey. And he is ok with it. Thats why people bring up his bankruptcy’s all the time, he just kind of laughs it off like its part of being an entrepreneur dude, you know. It just kind of moves on. And I kind of have the same viewpoint.

That’s awesome, so how much gut feeling influence your decisions in your business, I know you touched on that before, in your answer so it will be interesting to hear what you think.

It is imperitive, and when I put that question to everything, how does that feed my confusion? and strengthen my clarity? thats my first question I put to it and then I go eternally. Where I just kind of sit with and I actually do some body testing. And see if it is a fit or not, because your body is an antenna, really for your gut. Or for your higher self, or however you want to attack that. Versus the ego, you have got to get past the ego brain, and into the gut and so that is how I do it. Is I sit with it. And I do some body testing, so it makes it, I guess the question is how much do I do that? A lot.

Yeh, some people trust their gut and other people don’t, that gut feeling so its always interesting.

I look at both. I do look at what I call the reality. You know what I mean like the reality, the numbers, is it going to work? stuff like this, but I don’t discount the gut. And you have got to be both, you can’t go all gut or nothing. You know, I do believe that, because there is sometimes I hear things like ‘well my gut tells me I should go to South Africa and do nothing for a year,’ I’m like mmmm. would you think about that, you know. I don’t know how that is going to go. So you have to really think things through, not just ‘that sounds cool.’ Ha ha ha ha.

Absolutely ha ha ha ha ha ha. So Heather life is made of constant change whether we like it or not, and I believe that other people have said this that the only constant is change. So how do you try to keep up with change?

Oooh, here are a couple of things I do. There are pieces of me that do keep up with change, and I am constantly looking at ‘whats next, whats next, whats next?’ But I keep this principle in my head, that people and how we purchase and how we buy, because I am in marketing. Don’t really change. The medium has altered, right? sometimes we used to get in the car and then drive and then get out and then whatever right? ok and we get these things called newspapers, and find out whats going on. The medium has altered, yellow pages, but how and why we buy as a human being, the emotional side of that, has changed. So you have to kind of uncollapse. The change versus the human being has not changed. Technology has altered obviously and we obviously do things differently on ipads and iphones and Amazon versus Walmart or whatever. But really why we buy has not changed.

So that is the thing I have to consult when I call uncollapse. In the internet marketing world. Especially because I am constantly doing technology. And you have to go, ‘well is this something that is really have someone try to change, because if you try to change somebody, its hard. if you are trying to create a business or a service to change people, thats hard, thats a hard business. Ok so you want a business that people don’t necessarily change. But it enhances them, so does that answer your question?

Yeh. It does, in fact I would just like to dig a bit deeper on what you have said there, because something just fascinates me. I think that people have changed slightly, and I would just like you to explain why you don’t think this is the case. Because if you take how people used to buy say 30 years ago. People who were very much influenced by the adverts that they saw and they might read reviews in a magazine or something like that, so they were fed all this information from other commercial sources. Whereas now, you get fed information but people start to look for user reviews on things. They start to talk to their friends in facebook and things and see what they think. Do you not think that is a change in people?

No no

to some extent, I know it is an effect of technology but do you not think it is a change in the way people are to some extent. Because the less trusting are these commercial sources, and more trusting of people that they know and user reviews?

No because no. Here’s why lets say back in the 40’s or 50’s right? I’m a housewife and I look at a magazine and I see something I like, I might go to my neighbour Nancy and ask her if she brought it before. What does she think of it, has she done it? I might go to my bookclub that has 15 of my friends from the neighbourhood, ok asking them what they thought, or have they ever brought this or have they ever brought this or what are they using for that? Its the same thing as social media. The medium in which we do things has changed. We now go on facebook and go ‘who’s ever brought this?’ right? the medium has changed but the time-tested principles ok testimonials, emotion, moving towards positive and away from negative. These times tested principles of marketing and sales has not altered.

Yeh

We as human beings still seek reviews, still seek testimonials, we still seek looking good. That has not altered at all. Just the medium in which its happening, has altered. Thats the distinction and I think if you just time tested principles of marketing and sales, its what I call the time tested human being elements. Personal development. That core has not changed. Its just how we do it, has altered.

Mmm I think, no trying to challenge you completely on this, but if you go back to the person from the 50’s they ask around their friends and they find that if it was something like the ipod and no one had brought it for example then they are left with a decision of making a decision on their own. So at that point, they would have to rely on some other source if they still wanted further validation of their decision. Whereas now, you could go to people, your next best thing beyond the people you know are the people you don’t know aren’t they? In terms of user reviews and things because you can get a good idea of what things are about. So I just wonder if it has changed maybe just a little bit?

No because once those kinds of time tested principles are what I call the ‘needs’ once the men and the human being like they did get the answer, then they will go and make the purchase. The need has not changed, the needs of human beings have not changed.

I agree with what you are saying, but it is the fulfilling of that need at some point.

Yeh the fulfilling has altered. There used to be this magazine called ‘Consumer Reviews’ well you would pick up and you would go buy it or things like that. It used to be a Readers Digest. Or the TV Guide. These things are needs that we still have today. Now we just got to the remote, press guide. right? So again, that is just a technology alterisation, but the need of the human being is still – we don’t change much over the years. We as the need of the human being. You know what I mean? We don’t go to the bathroom differently, you know what I mean? Like there is not much changed. Its just that what we are focused on has altered. Thats based on technology.

Ok, so ha ha ha

Ha ha ha you can have your own, I just agree or disagree.

No I understand what you are saying. No I am not trying to, I just interested to hear your perspective because I thought it might have done and it is interesting to see, I suppose if you take it down to that raw need, then I suppose it has not.

Yeh no worries. Ha ha

Ha so what is your favourite book on entrepreneurialism or business, personal development, leadership or motivation? and can you tell us why you have chosen it?

Sure there is a book here on my desk, its called ‘The Game of Life and how to play it’ by Florence Schobelshon. Its a small book, I read it over and over and over again. Its kind of like my ‘War of Art’ book. Art of War too. Art of War is the sun shue and then War of Art is the new one by Steven Prestfield, which I absolutely love that book too.

I have just picked that book up actually, I am just about to read it.

I That book is amazing. It really talks about what we are talking about. Its such a great one as well, I highly suggest that one, a small read only a 120 pages, same thing with the Game of Life and how to play it, Florence Schobelshon she was around in the 20’s and 30’s. And what she does it, I believe in what I call ‘the Laws of the Universe’ I believe that, I believe there are laws of the universe – its not about religious. Its literally like laws of the universe, how things work, you know? and she kind of lays it out. This is the laws of the universe. And of course, the example she uses, you can tell its back in the 20’s you know. Based on timing and amount of money and things like that. But the principles are still there. So I read that over and over again. I love that book.

I shall check that out, when I finish this one. Everyone. When you have a busy life, listening to audio books is a great way to expand your knowledge in the time that you may be doing other things. Such as driving or going to the gym. We have a special offer for you of a free audio book of your choosing. To choose your free audio book, go to www.freeaudiobookoffer.com. As long as you have not already signed up, then you will qualify. Heather, what I would like to do now is fast forward to the future, and just ask you a few questions about that, so what one thing would you do with your business if you knew that you could not fail?

Its a great question, I am going to answer that, but I first want to say, if you go to autoball, my book is on autoball. Sexy Boss and its actually my voice. I did not outsource the voice over. I just want to say its the one of the most proudest things I have, I’ve done in my business that was one of the hardest things I have ever done. Is a voice over. Because there is writing a book, ok, and then there is talking about your book. But a voice over, audio book is like every single word of the book like this, you know. And you can’t sound like completely boring. So I actually went out and I did my audio book, and the producer, the editor and producer tried to talk me out of it. He was like ‘I’m not going to start you today, I want you to go home and think about it because I don’t think you should do this. Ha ha ha. And I was like ok, I was like, ‘I’m doing it.’ And he just kind of had this ahh god, you know. But it took me almost six weeks. I could only go in once a week for two hours, max two hours. Sometimes I went hour and a half and I would come home and just pass out, I was so exhausted.

Yeh

Because you are speaking your book which is one thing, but if you even miss a word, you know. He like yells at you, ‘you missed a word, go back’ in your ear. Like these big headphones you know. So anyway, I am very proud of my book. On autoball.

I So it worked out well in the end, I take it?

It did, it did. I’m very proud of it, I’m just up there, its like can I have this? Oh I did that, you know? That like my voice and my book and I’m very proud of it.

Good on you.

Thank you. You asked me the questions ‘what is one thing’

if you knew you couldn’t fail, that you would do in your business?

Oh god, there is so much. Well I think that what I am looking at right now with my boyfriend is to franchise it. Thats way out of my comfort zone. So I am a little sceptic on that, how do I franchise? how does that work? there are a lot of questions, in the franchising world. So that is one thing if I knew I could not fail, I would go for it. And now I am toe stepping into that. Like tapping, tapping into that. But that is one thing that if I knew, knew, knew, knew I could not fail, boom lets go. You know, thats what I’d do.

Yeh ok. what skill if you were excellent at it, would help you the most to double your business? I think I am ok at it. But I think I could be a mastery at it, there is always another level. Its copywriting, I mean I study it, I do it, I’m constantly doing writing, I’m constantly doing copy. But if I could say one thing that I think I would want to be excellent at, that would be it. Copywriting. I mean I study it, obviously Joe Sugarman, Dan Kennedy, other people, John Carlton, I just did a seminar in 2013, it was me. It was a headliner with Joe Sugarman. It was called ‘Success Magnate Seminar.com’ and it was John Carlton. Joe Polish, John Benson, Joe Sugarman, lot of Joes and myself. Lot of copywriters in the room and I just loved that event, there were so many amazing copywriters in the room. Thats the one skill that I think could just double anybody’s business.

Yeh someone else said that to me earlier today actually but its obvious really isn’t it? because you have got to get the word out there, so. In five years from now, if a well known business publication was writing an article on your business. After talking to your customers and suppliers, what would you like it to say?

I would say that working with Heather, she is an amazing leader. She has a way to help people move through the walls of entrepreneurship, and get to their success. And there’s results for that, people can see it. You know? I think people would like to do that plus I have another business, called E2Lab and its all about health. And I would love you could never say it right but they would love for them to say, ‘theres this person, this person, this person she’s helped them get rid of all their medications.’ ha ha ha ha – I’m a big farmer, and stopped cancer you know. Course, they can never say that, but I would love for them to say that. We did have a client that lost 59lbs in four months.

Wow

And she has gotton rid of all her big farmer medications. And her doctors are all kind of bomboggled with that. And her blood work has come back normal for the first time in over a decade and they are all kind of bomboggled with that because she is not taking their medication and so. That makes me really happy. Course you can’t say that too much around here. Thats what I would like for them to say.

Yeh ok thank you. We are now at the part of the show where you share your three golden nuggets, so Heather, what is your favourite quote? and how have you applied it in your business?

Well I have actually already said it, so ‘does this feed my confusion or strengthen my clarity?’ but I’ll give you another one. Thats my main one. But my second one is ‘never keep anyone in my life that is not part of my fan club.’ so I never keep anyone in my life that is not part of my fan club. Thats a key one.

Yeh thats good. I like that.

Thank you.

So you use that alot do you?

I do, well again these were kind of given to me when I was at a very low period of my life. When I was kind of re-building. When I was being attracted to people that were not great for me. You know? family/friends and they were in my ear, ‘you shouldn’t do this, you should do this.’ because I was very sceptible to outside influence at that time, because I was kinda broke. Ha ha. And I was listening to myself, I didn’t trust myself, I didn’t trust anybody, so I was listening alot to other people. And when my coach gave me that, it really made me think about every relationship. You know, and sometimes those are people that are blood. You know, so er never keep anyone part of my life that is not part of my fan club.

Yeh I can understand that. So when just thinking, you talked about your bankruptcy earlier, when that happened, did you find that some people you knew on the way up, still wanted to know you on the way down?

No like crickets, no. There were a few that were there and they are the friends to this day. I think no, when I was crashing – it took about a year to crash it. It was kind of overnight but then it took a year to have the full crash. It was dispersement, you know what I mean? There was about two people in my life at that point that stepped up and were there for me. But yeh, you really get to see who your friends are, and family are. I asked for help with my family and yeh that was crickets as well so, you really get to see who are friends or not. You also get to kind of time test yourself too. Yeh thats definately a big one, thats when my coach gave me that one, never keep anyone part of my life thats not part of my fan club. The hardest part for me with that at the time was ‘wow those aren’t people that are part of my fan club’ you know that was the oh my god. They are all part of my fan club, no they’re not, oh my god. You know, so you start to really look at first, you got to be a fan club of yourself. And then you will attract people with a bigger fan club of you. And then your fan club of them, like I am a huge fan of them. I mean I love these guys, so I am a fan of theirs as well. It goes both ways.

You reminded me of something Jim Rohn said, where he talked about choosing your friends carefully. Make sure they are there for you on the way down. And I just thought of that then, so

Yeh you will see who business partners are versus friends real quickly.

Yeh thanks for that.

Your welcome.

Do you have any favourite online resources that you could share with us that would be useful to everybody?

You know someone asks me this before, I am actually I love like denim and thats kind of a big one though. Stack that money. Thats kind of an interesting one, its a forum. I’m a part of. Stack that money. and Canva, love Canva because I don’t like photoshop at all. So this is just like little ones, infusionsoft, I could use that. They are not that great. Fiver. I think I am kind of a basic girl when it comes to online

Thats a few to go at.

But yeh Amazon. I am becoming like an Amazon freak a little bit. Amazon asked me and I am obviously a seller on Amazon. I have alot of books on Amazon type in Heather Havenwood, I have about six books on there. I love Amazon.

So Heather, what is your best advice to other entrepreneurs?

Be clear in what you want. Be clear in that this is a journey, and there is no necessarily an end. You know what I mean, like you can create the goal like you want to sell a business or what it looks like, what you call a goal. You have to realise there is no end that after you get that goal, there is another goal. And its a journey, and if you think you are the end of it, the cool thing about being an entrepreneur is you get to create again what’s next. And there is always a ‘whats next’ and I will leave it with this as during my bankruptcy or after my bankruptcy. I lived on an island for about a year where I kind of just stared off into the ocean, you know for about a year. And that was in Florida and I had this time of ‘what the hell happened? and whats next?’ kind of for about a year. And I remember it was Marco Island, it was in Florida and the average age on the island was 80. So there were a lot of retired people. But I remember sitting there at starbucks it was always busy. Because everyone was there doing nothing, because they are all retired. So you have to get that, it was not like New York busy where all the people were in and out in and out. This is called ‘everyones hanging out’ because there is no where to go.

Ha ha ha ha.

And no one was into computers so, they are hanging out at starbucks. Wanting to talk to you so you could literally walk in there and have a conversation with a complete stranger. At any time of the day. Because they are all retired. And I remember that very distinctly because I realised that the men and women that were in their 80’s or that were whatever the one that were still business owners or some level right. Even if they had given their business up to the next generation. They still were involved. Their brain was still going. You know they were still involved in something, they were still in the business of some level they were creating. They were still active at some level. They were the ones that were healthy. The ones that had these corporate jobs or government jobs, and then they ‘fully retired’ They are the ones that I saw, my view, they were like dying off really fast. You know like, it was almost like they had nothing to live for. And I really saw that and I went, ‘you know what, I get it there is no end’ it always ongoing, ongoing, ongoing. What’s next? and if you have that in mind, then you won’t get so upset. You know and you also won’t feel like, ok I’m about to die off. I think that is a key piece.

I just saw that, human beings, we want to see what is next.

We are beings aren’t we? we have to be something. I think that is the point. I think there is quite a bit of evidence to support that actually from what I can understand. I don’t know exactly but, I am sure thats the case that people who keep busy that statistics actually show what you said there in terms of people who keep there minds busy are more likely to live longer, than people who sort of feel like they have got this void in their life because they don’t have to go and do the 9-5 any more.

Right and I don’t like that word anymore of retire because its like that. The people that came onto the island, that were ‘really retired’ meaning like they did government jobs or something, meaning like its done. They are the ones, their health would slip fast.

Yeh.

But the ones that still had, even if it was not there business you know, but they had a family member in it. They were still involved. They would call, ‘hows it going?’ let me give you some advice, they were kind of mentoring still, a little you know. They are the ones that were still active and walking around and moving around and you know, playing tennis at 80. And stuff like that, it was really fascinating for me to see the difference. Between a business owner who was retiring versus a government employee. There was a big difference and how they viewed life and how they were on a health level. It was fascinating, their mind was very different.

I can imagine. Everyone, if you did not manage to get a note of Heather’s favourite resource or her favourite book, you can find the links on Heather’s shownotes page. Just go to the entrepreneurway.com and search for Heather or search for HeatherHavenwood in the search box. Heather, is there anything else that you would like to add about your business right now?

Sure, thank you so much, I just would encourage you as an entrepreneur, to get a coach. A marketing coach, business coach, life coach. One or all three. And I am a marketing and business coach, that is what I do, I would love to have the opportunity for potentially you guys to look at me as one of those coaches. And go to HeatherHavenwood.com and click on workwithheather. But if its not me, someone. You know someone to help you through the mindset of what are my goals? what am I going to do? What is the first step? in keeping you accountable for that, because I know for myself, if I don’t have my coach, I would be in circles. I would just be like a horse walking round in circles. You know, that is what I would suggest. And then for women, you can check on my book at debidebidebi.sexybossinc.com when you opt in, you actually get three free chapters of my audio book. So I give you three free chapters, you don’t have to go to autoball if you don’t like.

fantastic.

yeh so thank you so much for having me. And I just love the entrepreneur way because it is a journey in a way.

Absolutely, well it has been an absolute honour having you on here. You have certainly given us some really insightful ideas and thoughts about the entrepreneur way. And you have given me a lot to think of and I am sure everyone else has got a lot to think about from it as well. So, thank you.

You are welcome. Thank you.